Why are some bad habits so hard to break?
And what about positive traits that we desire…
why are they often so elusive?
Our habits, for better or worse, are strong indicators of what we’re really about… providing insight into our thoughts, and reliable predictors of our future actions and behavior.
Yes, we initially create our habits… and then our habits create us. They provide the color to the glasses through which we view the world. They become our identity.
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I was recently approached by someone who wanted an opinion to correct a situation in their life.
It seems they were known as a person who was always ‘modestly late’, but recently it had really begun to bother them. “I’m always late… everywhere I go… late. What can I do?”
My answer, of course, was along the lines of “There’s nothing you can do… until you change your identity… change how you see yourself. Right now, you’re a late person. A smoker, smokes…
a drinker, drinks… and a late person is, well… late.”
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The key to making positive improvements (new habits) is to draw the line, make the decision, and then manage the decision in very small increments.
For example, if I decide I need to get more exercize (which wouldn’t hurt), the wrong way to do it would be to plan to run five miles a day, rain or shine, in sickness or health, summer or winter
(I live in Wisconsin).
This is almost certain to fail. (Failure, by the way, if not handled properly, can also become a habit… an identity.)
No… here is the way to begin creating an exercise habit. “At 10 a.m. this morning, I am going to walk around the block.”
Period… then make a similiar decision tomorrow. One day at a time… one hour at a time if necessary.
If you want to quit smoking… don’t give them up for life. Good grief. Just refrain for the next 30 minutes… and then do it again. One hundred twenty hours later… five days… and all the chemical dependency is gone.
These simple actions create habits, and those habits create our character.
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So what about the person above who struggled with time?
We made an appointment to have coffee at ten to six; they were early.
And so it begins…
Takeaway:
Habits are created a little at a time.
Questions:
Are there any habits you would like to create… or erase… in 2009?
What benefits would you accrue by doing so?
How would it affect your finances, health, or relationships?
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