“Sometimes it’s just easier to be alone…”
“Relationships were never my strong-suit…”
“I’m just not a people-person…”
Looking into her middle-aged eyes, I saw the emptiness and understood the emotions. At various times, they have been my own.
Yes, I sensed the hurt, the pain and the loneliness that accompanied her sentiments. It is the same hurt and pain and loneliness that denies the very truth of such statements, because deep down I believe that we are all people-people, or at least… we all want to be.
It is said that nature abhors a vacuum. Now, I’m no physics expert (my daughter will confirm), but I do know that there are holes in our lives that need to be filled… the biggest of which are relational.
And fill them we will!
Yes, our need for meaningful spiritual and social relationships WILL be addressed, one way or another. If we’re healthy, we do that positively through activities that build our relationships with our Creator and the Created.
If we’re unhealthy, who knows…
A deficit in our ability to connect with others leaves a huge void, and given the right set of circumstances there is no telling what we might be willing to stuff into those holes to quell that pain… food, sex, isolation, cutting, drink, drugs, work, exercise, knowledge, religion, rebellion, celebrity, ambition, sports, anger, despair, sadness, blame.
Self-destruction.
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I am leaving in a few minutes to spend the next fifteen hours among people – gosh, it seems they’re everywhere!
And my hope is that by the end of the day some of our holes may have closed just a little; that we will each have a handful of potential new relationships… and within those, that none of us will ever be quite the same.
I look forward to hearing from you.
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